Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Going Outside My Comfort Zone, for Women and Humans, Everywhere.

I’m going outside of my comfort zone with this post. I don’t typically post things that are too serious. I tend to shy away from conflict to a fault, and I worry endlessly about upsetting people around me. But sometimes, there are things that supersede that and right now, I feel almost complicit if I don’t speak up on behalf of women.
This is not about politics, so please don’t make political arguments in the comments. This is about shedding light on a really important, pervasive topic that affects so very many women every single day. This matters so, so, so much.
I believe strongly in everyone’s right to their own viewpoints, political leanings, and to have issues that matter most to them. And because I love my family and friends, I do not want to argue about something like politics. This is not about Trump as a candidate and I don’t want to discuss that. We’ve all reached our own conclusions by this point.
I wanted to share this article to highlight why a huge majority of people are upset about the Trump tapes, where he boasted about forcing himself on women. It’s not about crude words. It’s not about talking dirty.
It’s about assault.
About groping or grabbing or kissing a woman who doesn’t want to be touched, or who doesn’t know it’s coming. It’s assault. It’s not okay. For all the funny jokes and memes making fun of people for being upset about a bad word. No. That is not even close to the point. And yes, Bill Clinton, JFK, and many others have awful assault-filled pasts. This is not about them and they are not excused because of their political affiliation. Neither is Bill Cosby or Brock Turner or any of the other scum. They are in the same company as others like them. They are also not running for president.
Of course men and women talk about sex, many crudely, sure. That is NOT what this was. Some people don’t seem to realize that. This was not using crude language that discussed a woman’s looks or about what happened between two consenting adults. It was bragging about doing what he wants whether they want it or not. Whether they even know he's going to do it or not.
Also, an aside, to say all men are like this is an insult to all the decent, wonderful men out there. So shout out to the many awesome dudes willing to say this is not okay.
CONSENT is the issue. If you truly feel this is not a deep, deep problem in our society, read this article. A simple hashtag began over the weekend where women talked about their “first assaults.” I followed it for awhile but had to stop because I was in tears reading the accounts. The responses were coming in 50 a minute and by Monday morning there were 27 MILLION responses. 27 MILLION assaults on women, gathered under one hashtag in a matter of a few days.
You may not see it, but for millions of women, it is reality from a very young age, and on a very constant basis. Read this article. Please.
This is not okay. Violence toward women is NOT OKAY. Bragging about assault is NOT OKAY.
They are not just words. They are words that describe assaulting women because he can take what he wants because he’s “a star.” They are the words of a 59 year old man bragging about assaulting women. Laughing about it. If we allow it to be okay, if we blow it off, we are complicit in (further) normalizing assault.
It is not okay.
Peace and love, Jenn
Rude comments, arguments or stupid memes will be deleted. This isn’t about bad words or Bill Clinton or But Hillary did . . . or anything else. It’s about assault and the fact that so many people want to stay in a reality where it is normal and accepted, or where it is simply overlooked.
Please keep it civil. The political climate and the hate and vitriol have left many very raw and traumatized.
Love you all and thank you for reading. Be kind to one another friends.